Thursday, 04 May 2006 - Wisdom to know the difference

Dear God:

Today, I am thankful for "wisdom to know the difference."

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
~Reinhold Niebuhr

Remedy it, or welcome it: a wise man's only two choices. ~Terri Guillemets

See everything; overlook a great deal; correct a little. ~Pope John XXIII

It took me a long time to understand the Serenity Prayer and apply it to my life. My controlling, perfectionist personality and strong leadership abilities are excellent traits for the workplace but not for a marriage.

I've learned a lot in the process of growing up. Things like picking my battles carefully, making the best of what I've been given, playing the hand I've been dealt, making delicious lemonade from lemons and finding silver linings in storm clouds. I've also learned that when I point my finger at another to place blame, three fingers point back at me.

Nothing is easy. Especially changing myself. I know that I must pay the price if I am to reap any reward for my efforts. Good intentions don't matter. Inner work is a sweaty, heart pumping workout. Introspection often leaves me with nagging aches and pains.

And, because I am human and imperfect, the work never ends:
- Raising a low self-esteem
- Gaining confidence
- Nurturing belief in self
- Conquering the eating disorder and out-of-whack body image
- Healing a broken heart and battered soul
- Praying for others including my enemies
- Praying for me, just in case
- Reining in my critical, judgmental nature
- Seeing myself as others see me
- Nailing my pride and selfishness to the Cross - daily
- Forgiving others
- Forgiving myself

Maturity. Wisdom. Experience. Serenity.

Life comes together slowly.

If it comes together, at all.

For this blessing, I am grateful.

Amen.